When I was in sixth grade, I had a teacher who called me “flighty.” At the time, I didn’t know what the word meant, but I was sure it wasn’t a compliment. My mother had a teacher who told her that she would be lucky to get a job as a cashier. My husband had a teacher who removed him and his friend from the class choir because, she said, they sounded like frogs.
“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me” is not true. Words may not leave physical scars or bruises, but they most definitely can and do hurt. And, sometimes, they are remembered for years, maybe even a lifetime.
Perhaps that’s why James doesn’t pull any punches when teaching about the importance of tongue-taming. Words give us the ability to talk, to teach, and to tattle. Words help us communicate, coordinate, and compete. Words can also be extremely divisive, misleading, and hurtful. Words have the power to build up and the power to destroy.
The Layman’s Bible Book Commentary (Volume 23, page 83) says, “A fist can reach only three feet, but the tongue is an intercontinental ballistic missile.”
Words can, in fact, be deadly.
James makes it clear that we need to take our words very seriously, especially those of us who consider ourselves teachers. But even James admits that it is a difficult task. In fact, he says that although man has tamed all kinds of animals, “no one can tame the tongue.” (James 3:8a)
It’s true—we will never be able to master our mouths perfectly. But in order to put our faith into practice, James expects that we will still try. So, how do we do that? How do we try to be consistent in controlling our tongues?
Although James addresses this issue in detail in Chapter 3, he actually gives us advice on the matter in every chapter of his book. Once again, here are a few practical ways that James suggests we can put our faith into practice regarding our words.
Ask God for wisdom to help you control your words. (James 1:5)
Be patient, even when the circumstances are hard. (James 1:12)
Confess your own weaknesses (sins). (James 5:16)
Don’t speak evil against each other. (James 4:11)
Empty yourself in humility before God and others. (James 4:7)
Forgo the grumbling. (James 5:9)
Get rid of immorality; live honorably. (James 1:21 and 3:13)
Hold your temper. (James 1:19-20)
Identify areas where you are most tempted to negatively use your words. (James 1:14-15)
Just say “yes” or “no”; don’t use oaths. (James 5:12)
Keep jealousy at bay. (James 4:1-2)
Listen more than you speak. (James 1:19)
Make God’s Word a priority; know it and obey it. (James 1:22)
Never boast. (James 4:16)
Opt for peace. (James 3:17)
Pray for yourself and each other. (James 5:13 and 16)
Quit complaining; patiently endure. (James 1:12)
Remember to be merciful. (James 2:13)
Sing praises. (James 5:13)
Treat your neighbors with love. (James 2:8)
Understand the power of your words. (James 2:5-6)
Value generosity in actions and speech. (James 1:2:16 and James 3:14-16)
Wage war against Satan. (James 4:7)
eXercise repentance when you mess up. (James 4:7-8)
Yield your position when necessary. (James 3:17)
Zip it up! (James 1:26)
Communication is a powerful but dangerous tool. Therefore, it is our duty as Christ-followers to be intentional about using our words to help and not to harm. This is another way for us to put our faith into practice.
THIS WEEK
Continue memorizing James 1:22. Try to say it out loud to someone without looking.
Read James 3:1-12 every day.
Pray about how you use your words. Ask the Lord to help you identify areas of weakness. Confess your sins and ask Him to help you.
Print the “ABCs of Tongue-Taming.” Spend a few minutes this week reading through the verse references.